It is definitely not an easy task to be the parent of a girl that is turning into a woman. It’s difficult to keep up with the myriad of changes that happen almost daily in your own household. Your daughter is not the only one facing a great deal of confusion. You, as well, are finding this stage to be difficult.
Remember when she was just a little one? It was much easier to go from baby cribs to dresses to her first pink bike. You could be there as an active parent and you could be relatively confident. Today, things have changed.
When did she start looking so grown up? The girls sweatshirts that used to shelter her from the wind were traded in for clothes that make her look much older than her years. It’s hard to watch her as she struggles with first crushes, trying to figure out how smart she should be without coming across too strong, and how to navigate the world as she starts to develop her very own angst.
Today, her shirts for girls are really shirts for women. Her musical tastes have gone from that cute bubble gum pop to harder selections that sound angry. You wonder if she’s doing Okay but you’re not really sure how to ask her. You’re just like every other parent of a young woman.
There is no remedy for the situation. As she starts to break free from the stereotypes that she rallies against, she turns directly to another stereotype. Her flight in this world can be paved with her own certainty or it can be pitted with her own insecurity. From one day to the next you don’t know which it will be because she doesn’t know which it will be.
The whole world is growing up faster than ever. It wasn’t that long ago that twelve year olds looked twelve. Now they are young women heading out into the world looking like fully grown women. It seems like she has changed so fast that you fear you don’t know her anymore. If you don’t know her, you wonder how you’ll be able to parent her.
Her struggle for her own identity will continue on and you will have to develop a bit of faith in her process. Women’s roles are undefined. This means that she can try out a wide variety of potential lives before she even turns 15. You can only be there to guide her and to love her. Respecting the fact that she is growing fast and furiously will help the two of you stay connected.
